Playing by the Rules
by Marcia Reynolds

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The real tragedy inherent in today`s society is not our attitude about work, but the waste of what we call our "free" or "leisure" time. When we`re not at work, we`re presumably at play. But how playful do we allow ourselves to be?

Most people, when asked how they feel during their time off, reply, "Fine." Often, this stock response seems an acronym for "feelings inaccessible-near empty." Certainly, many of us spend our free time feeling apathetic, bored, and unfulfilled-in short, lifeless.

What a sorry state of affairs we`ve constructed in forgetting how to play. During the week, the interlude between leaving the workplace and returning to it is far from memorable. Weekends are no better: we spend them completing to-do lists or pumping up our adrenaline by watching others compete. Then we seek out the company of strangers to share in chemically induced laughter. Even when we go on vacation, we race around to see everything and judge unplanned situations as annoyances.

As a result, we’ve become highly developed in the art of not feeling, locking the door to our emotions. Although we may cry over a sad movie or the loss of a friend, we immediately rein in our emotions and send them back to confinement. Eventually, some of our harnessed emotions, such as sadness and anger, erupt when least expected. Others, such as love, die from starvation. According to cardiologist and psychotherapist Stephen Sinatra, MD, in his book Optimum Health, "Just as stagnant water can become toxic, the blocking of [our] feelings, intuition, pleasures, and desires can be equally toxic."

It’s time to rekindle our sense of play. The following set of rules will help clear the channel to your heart.

PLAYGROUND RULES

1. No running

Live is blurry in the fast lane. Do everything more slowly. Enjoy your food, linger in the shower, and listen carefully to your friends.

2. Turn off the TV and sign off the Internet

Instead, plug into curiosity. What shape is tonight’s moon? Are there any new flowers on your block? What is your best friend feeling tonight? Bake something new, learn a new song, and play a new game. There’s so much you can do.

3. Choose your playmates well.

Find people who help you to laugh, daydream, and be silly with, leaving the others at home to whine. 4. Stop whining.

Give yourself a half an hour every day to whine. Then shut it off the rest of the day. When you feel like complaining, promise yourself you will have your time tomorrow. And please, quit worrying about things you can’t control. Focus your energy on what is within your power to change and you will feel much stronger.

5. “Leggo” your ego

Laugh at your mistakes. Celebrate your faults. Admit to being embarrassed. Draw your portrait with shaving cream on the mirror. To rise above your frustrations and worries, you have to be light.

Spread your wings and laugh out loud. You’ll find the freedom delicious.